


he knows

by prosecutorpumpkin



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Study, Gen, Post-Kingdom Hearts III, and yes they are being treated as the same but separate here, fight your double
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-05
Updated: 2020-03-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:09:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23020750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prosecutorpumpkin/pseuds/prosecutorpumpkin
Summary: He broke away from his destiny.Was that really the right choice?
Comments: 1
Kudos: 18





	he knows

**Author's Note:**

> This was a brief story snippet for an RP group I'm in but it also works as a standalone sort of thing so here you go.

Xigbar isn't sure what draws him back to this place.

The sun baked earth splitting at its seams, the Keyblades jutting upward like morbid stalks. The stench of blood soaked into the dirt, never to be washed completely clean. Wind batters his face with sand and death, and through it he can note just how different it feels when he's like this.

When he is outside of his cloak, instead robed in cottons and linens; when his hair is loose and free and billows wildly in the wind instead of hanging heavily, taut and constricting. He inhales and the dry air parches his lungs, but he smiles.

"Finally."

A voice, younger but frightfully familiar straightens Xigbar's smile into a thin line, his eye popping wide in shock. The crunch of boot on sand grinds behind him, and for a second, he is afraid to turn.

Afraid.

An emotion he hasn't felt in so long.

"I need to get rid of you...and set this right," continues the voice. Xigbar's throat bobs in a harsh swallow.

He doesn't want to turn. He doesn't want to.

He does.

Somehow, in front of him, is a black cloaked figure. A hood hides his face, but he knows, instinctively, who it is. The boyish figure, the timid yet determined voice.

The heavy, lacquered box.

The sinister, eye studded Keyblade, brandished at him.

"You've gone too far off the path."

Xigbar does his best to keep control of his breathing, which has begun to hike. He knows this man. Knows him so intimately, knows him and wishes he could forget--

"Who the hell told you?" He mutters under his breath. "You shouldn't be able to know this, it's a paradox--"

The figure's stance shifts, and lifts his head.

"I was informed because I needed to know! If the Master finds out..."

"Who?!"

"If the Master finds out, he'll destroy us!"

The figure's voice echoes throughout the canyon, and a bead of sweat begins to fall from Xigbar's forehead.

"Luxu...you're an idiot..."

"No, you!" The reply is so childish that it would've been funny were it not so distressed, so desperate. "You are the idiot for abandoning our role! The World...he entrusted us the World, and you abandoned it! Our role was most important and you abandoned it, us!"

"It wasn't important at all. The Master was just a lazy son of a--"

"Shut up!" Luxu's voice spikes as Xigbar's stance does its best to relax, to look unflappable in the face of danger.

"This isn't our story. Never was. And the sooner you realize you were just playin' pawn in the Master's game--"

Luxu shakes his head furiously, hands struggling to grip both No Name and the hood of his cloak as though trying to keep his thoughts inward. His knees shake, though he tries his best to keep his voice firm.

"You're wrong! He...he wanted us to succeed...because he loves us..."

"You think he loves you?"

Luxu's back stiffens, his voice steel.

"The Master spared us out of his love for us! We are his son, his pride and joy..." Luxu's hidden face turned downward, and Xigbar's eye narrows at the gesture. "We're still alive and that is proof enough. Surely you wouldn't say he didn't love us--"

"'Course he loved us."

Cloaked head snaps forward, and Xigbar can barely see the dropped jaw beneath it, slack with inability to speak.

He ignores the singular tear hanging from his chin.

"But does it justify your fear?" Xigbar begins pacing wide, slow circles around Luxu, whose gaze follows. "You're afraid of him...afraid of failing him. Doesn't sound like the kinda love I wanna pursue, follow?"

Luxu's grip tightens on No Name, and Xigbar can feel the angered sneer radiating from his body. He snaps the Keyblade at his older self, and roars.

"You're a failure!"

Xigbar's heart gallops and his blood pools in his stomach. The eye pointed at him seems to roll forward as if to face him directly. His stomach lurches, and instinctively he begins to clutch at it with his hand.

"I..."

What could he say? That he gave up on his mission purposefully? That he did it for something as stupid and meaningless as love? That the name his Master slandered him with, Luxuria, overbearing, overwhelming, unable to control himself, was an accurate descriptor?

He gave up the mission...for...

"If I didn't stop it, the people we love would have died."

"They're already dead!"

Xigbar wants to be sick. Luxu's body is shaking, his hands curled into fists, his voice cracking like sugar shards carelessly dropped to the ground.

"The Unions...Daybreak Town...our fellow Foretellers. THEY were your duty, THEY'RE the only people who we should have ever cared about! You KNOW that! We only live for the Master now! Where is your pride? Our blade?!"

At that, Xigbar's eye goes from gazing blankly at the cracked earth to blazing with fury at the younger him. The sun beats down mercilessly on tanned face as he stretches himself open, puffing out arms and chest and shoulders as if to engulf the smaller him. His expression turns into a trained, familiar one: torn with awful smile and horrid glare.

"Right here!"

He inhales dramatically, and his hand pushes forward, fingers stretching out towards Luxu. Immediately, Luxu is thrown back, buffeted by some unknown force, as the Keyblade is desummoned and suddenly resummoned into Xigbar's waiting grip. Its weight is heavy, the keychain clinking somber greetings.

He wants to throw it away immediately.

The hood is blown back, crumpling around Luxu's shoulders as his foot hovers mid stumble. Xigbar's eye lingers on the soft face of barely broken adulthood: eyes wrenched in desperate cry, lips frozen mid horrified scream. Youthful freckles still scatter earth brown skin, wine red hair pulled taut into intricate buns and braids. A beautiful frozen portrait of fear.

"No!" Luxu's throat is torn raw from his plea, suddenly overcome by terror. "Please!"

"Pathetic, aren't you." Xigbar's voice is a low growl, eye cold, lips sneering. He gestures widely with the cruel keyblade, its sharp edges cutting through the thick, dirt smeared air.

"Please!" Luxu's plea is wild now, flying between groveling and howling. "You CAN'T! I need it, that's all I am!"

"This? This thing is all you are? Man, I really should just put you out of your misery. I should break it. Drop it into the void. Maybe it'll crack the old bastard's heart right along with it, wouldn't that be somethin'?"

Indifferent laughter cracks through the air over Luxu's enraged scream. Purple and blue and black spreads from Xigbar's feet, falling downward into endless black. He lifts the keyblade, eye down, and for a moment his face is grim.

"I'm saving you, us."

"NO!"

The air freezes, and Xigbar gasps gutterally in shock as the keyblade is torn from his grasp by an invisible force, landing solidly back into Luxu's grip.

"Master--"

"YOU'RE A MISTAKE!"

Silver swivels in an arc, black cloak a flurry, and Xigbar looks above him to see angry, tear glossed eyes drilling into his soul--

Xigbar blocks him with a hastily summoned arrowgun, rolling off to the side, breathing unevenly.

"Don't let anger dictate your moves," he drawls effortlessly, though his shoulders shake from the impact. Damn, the kid was strong..."First lesson."

Luxu charges at him again, but before another hit comes anywhere close to landing, the void swallows Xigbar whole, and draws him far, far away.

The last words that reach him before the void echo in his mind.

"You doomed me!"


End file.
